Post-Prog-Noise Rocker Walks Dickhouse Down the "Hallways of Always, Pal": AN INTERVIEW WITH JON HASSELL.

CAMBRIDGE, Massachussetts (DH)- After Constants' homecoming show at TT and the Bear's, I got a chance to sit down with guitarist Jon Hassell.

We're sitting at the bar. He swigs on a pint of Harp, brushes the sweat from his brow with his sopping wet "My Blue Heaven" shirt, and lets out a profound sigh.

DH: What a show. That was truly far out.

JH: WHAT?! (He doesn't hear me)

DH: WHAT a SHOW. THAT was FAR OUT.

JH: Hold on, man...(removes his ear plugs and motions for me to follow him outside)

DH: (outside the club now) I said that your show was really far out.

JH: Thanks, man. This whole tour's been some crazy shit.

DH: Like what?

JH: Hey...the hallways of always, pal.

DH: ...-- Oh yeah, like your myspace quote, right?

JH: (lighting the second part of a joint he's fished out of his pocket) What?

DH: Doesn't matter. (He takes a sip, offers, I pass) So you've been on tour for a few years with Constants.

JH: Yeah, we drive a veggie oil bus.

DH: Cool. So has your band received any endorsements from Al Gore?

JH: What?

DH: Doesn't matter. So, tell about the show you just played. How do you think it went?

JH: It was electrifying.

DH: Yeah, like Grease?

JH: What?

DH: Doesn't matter. So it was electrifying.

JH: Yeah, man (hits chest with his fist), I really felt that one, you know?

DH: Oh yes. I know.

JH: Yeah.

DH: So how is being back in your old stopping grounds? Back in Boston?

JH: I haven't slept much since I got back. I was up all night. Slept a few hours this morning on a buddy's couch. Then got a couple beers. Then smoked part of a joint. Then took 3 Red Bulls to the face. Then came to the show.

DH: Wow. How are you feeling?

JH: Pretty GOOD.

DH: So back to the show. At one point during the show you took your guitar and threw it against the wall.

JH: It wasn't making the sound I wanted it to make.

DH: It wasn't making the sound you wanted it to make.

JH: Nope.

DH: You ever watch any Who concerts on DVD?

JH: Huh?

DH: Doesn't matter.

JH: Yeah, now the neck's all fucked up...

DH: Weird.

JH: Yeah. Sucks.

DH: Hey--side note question: what's the deal with all the carabiners?

JH: Huh?

DH: How come you and every person at the club tonight are wearing carabiners?

JH: Oh, our carabiners (he motions to his)?

DH: So, are keychains out? Did I miss that meeting--

JH: --No, just--

DH: --Or do all of you space rockers mountain climb?

JH: Well, I wouldn't exactly call it space rock. We prefer post-prog-noise rock.

DH: Okay. Do all of you post-prog-noise rockers mountain climb?

JH: Yeah, man (he holds his fist in the air). We climb the mountains of noise rock.

DH: But not literally.

JH: Huh?

DH: But you don't literally climb mountains.

JH: Our minds can do anything.

DH: So...that's a no?

JH: The hallways of always, pal.

DH: All right. Well, great show and thanks for taking a moment to talk with me.

JH: That's all you're gonna ask me?

DH: Uh, well I thought I'd let you get back--

JH: --like, you're not gonna ask me: what color underwear I'm wearing?

DH: Um...no?

JH: Baby blue, thank you very much.

DH: Sorry.

JH: Asshole.

DH: Right on.

JH: Mm-hmm.

DH: Fuckin' A.

JH: FUCKIN'. A.



This post's muse: POINT/COUNTERPOINT: Bumper Sticker Manufacturing Existentialists VS. Nay Sayers

POINT. Bumper Sticker Manufacturing Existentialists: The hokey pokey IS what it's all about.

COUNTERPOINT. Nay Sayers: No it's not.